So long ago. Friends are back, but I still have none. Love is still there, yet I still have no one.

What am I missing from this life?

No, it wasn’t because my fucking room was messy, it was because someone opened my mother fucking window. That’s how the damned thing came into my fucking room, NOT because it was messy. I keep that window shut for a fucking reason, BECAUSE DISGUSTING SHIT, LIKE SPIDERS, COME INTO MY FUCKING ROOM, SO DON’T TOUCH MY SHIT.

So my brother gets to go and see Snoop Dogg, after I asked him WAY before this very day to get me a MOTHER, FUCKING, BRACELET to Bluesfest. Am I pissed? Oh yeah, extremely. My friends? They’re a big disappointment, especially the one that I call my best. My love life? Dying, at an alarming rate. My life? Fuck it.

All of my so-called best friends are lying bitches. If they want to keep shit from me and just ignore me then so be it. I don’t want to have anything to do with any of them..

Canada day was the weirdest day ever. Drugs, alcohol, tears and insane flirting was involved for sure. It was INSANE…

So my day started off pretty shitty. I worked and I was angry that I could not get my hands on any alcohol. I then went to my friend’s house and hung out with my other friends as well and started to drink. Then we went to my other friend’s house to drink even more. On the way there we saw a hooker getting picked up lmao. It was great. So then we took tequila shots, they weren’t THAT terrible, then we made our way downtown. I don’t want to get into too much detail because I’m pretty tired, but let’s just say that I saw many different sides of my friends that I have never seen before.

Anyways, I’m tired, and I need to shower cause I smell and I have a rash on my back because of my alcohol allergy. GAY.

I don’t really know about anyone else who feels the same way as I do, but personally, summer fucking sucks right now. The weather sucks SO bad, it keeps on raining. Everything else is just a disappointment. I guess I’m just in a really bitchy mood, but everyone around me has been kind of retarded. My friends are kind of mean and cold to me, and my family is just…whatever, and I don’t see much of my boyfriend. He’s always gone, and it’s kind of really annoying. I really want everything to just be good. This is so annoying and my life and my summer has been a complete and utter drag. Fuck this shit. Anyways, I leave you with some super emo lyrics. Enjoy, I guess…

Lately I’ve been feeling a little bit neglected. When it comes to your ex-boyfriends, well, I guess I’m overprotective. But it’s nothing personal. I just wanted you to tell me that you care. Lately I’ve been thinking bout’ stickin’ my hand in a toaster. I never asked to take a ride on this emotional roller coaster. It’s you that I want, and lately it feels like you’re not there. Lately I’ve been contemplating jumping in the ocean. Sometimes even Spock would show a little more emotion! Do you still love me now as much as you loved me yesterday? I try to let it out. I bitch, cry, moan, whine, scream and shout today, but the wall wouldn’t listen to me! Why wouldn’t it listen to me? I’m sick of always cryin’. I don’t wanna be sick of trying, but you’ve gotta want me too. Lately I’ve been hoping for a little bit of affection. Sometimes I wish that you had came with your own set of directions. I guess it’s not that easy, but I hope that you still love me anyway. Lately I’ve been thinkin’ bout’ takin’ a vow of silence. I’ve never seen a monk result in any acts of violence. Or, maybe I’ll just cry and hope you come around again today.

That song has been stuck in my head all day. So basically this weekend has been pretty crazy. Friday was my last day of school kinda because I had my last exam on that day (history). Then I hung out with my friends Sam and Alison. We went to the Aritzia Private Pre-Sale because I am a valued customer and all.

***just woke up lmao. retyping this note from last night***

So anyways, yeah then we went back to my house to watch CAMP ROCK which by the way was fucking amazinggg. So then the next morning I went to work. It was gay and retarded as usual. But after I went to my friend Roxanne’s birthday party. It was prettttyyyy intense I must say. I bought lots and lots of juice and I kept myself together but a lot of the people there did not really know how to hold their liquor. It was fun though. The next morning, I was sooo out of it. I was dizzy, I was throwing up everywhere, not cool. And the worst part was that I had to go to work! After that I went to my friend Tricia’s house and her boytoy Mitch was there. I liked making fun of him, but then he took my slipper. After Alison and my other friend Julie came and we burnt all our notes. I’m surprised no one said anything but, oh well. Before that we went to McD’s and we saw our friends Lucas, Momo and Adam, and my old old old friend Tyler, but they were all high and it sucked. Oh well.

So that was my weekend. Today I’m supposed to hang out with Nick which makes me really happy because I miss my lover. So yeah, payce.

So, my guitar broke. I need to buy a new one. Yes yes I know it was just a string but apparently it’s going to cost a lot to fix it since it’s an old guitar, so buying a new one is “cheaper”.

Other than that, today was ok. I told my dad I wasn’t mad at him anymore (I got mad at him, because he wanted to return my father’s day present for him) and I told my friend about some problems we had, but we got over it and we’re good, hopefully. I wrote my religion exam today. It was easy obviously. I hope I did well. I have 2 more exams to go (french and history), then I am finished! I’m so excited to just not go to school and do whatever.

So, I’m bored again. I’ll find something to do. Maybe I’ll study..

So, today is the last official day of school. I decided to not come for the morning because all we were doing was review and watching movies, but I am going to my 3rd period class (hospitality) because I have an exam. I know, totally gay. Next week I have my french, religion and history exams, then I’m finished! I’m glad that this year is almost over, it was terrible. All the drama with friends and boys, but in the end there were some makeups. I really don’t know what to expect for the summer to be completely honest. I am getting a new job (goodbye Tim Hortons!) and I guess I’ll be hanging out with the world. I am not completely sure if my boyfriend and I are going to last but, we’ll see.

I’ve been trying to get somewhat creative with my new handy dandy camera, but I haven’t gotten any time at all. I will post pictures up, I promise! But for now, I must get my hair all nice and did.

P.S. Check out my new piercing:

Getting ready for school. It’s dress down day today so we don’t have to wear uniform. I’m wearing an FCUK shirt my sister got me. It’s cool and all but I look soo very emo. It’s all good though. It’s raining, which means my hair will get curly. I have a history test today, and I haven’t studied.

So basically, today I am screwed. Wish me luck.